I've been thinking a lot lately about the idea of hard work and striving towards what you want. I recently received an assignment back for Introduction to Journalism that I worked my ass off to ensure that it was the best I could produce. I have honestly never worked so hard on a university assignment to date. I followed every part of the criteria to the tee, I wrote it days before it was due and continued to edit it, I found source after source, I did so much. As confident as I was in my assignment, I didn't want to 'count my chickens before they hatched', I didn't want to automatically assume that it was as fantastic as I believed it to be. But it turns out that it was all that I thought it was, I received a distinction and a mark of 82%. As I discussed it in detail with my tutor, one thing that she said to me as she smiled and looked me in the eyes was "I know that you're working so hard and it's wonderful that I'm able to reward it".

So later I got to thinking about the significance of hard work and what it means in our lives. The reason that I worked hard on this particular assignment, apart from the fact that I enjoy succeeding, is this is what I want to do. I want to be a journalist, so doing exceptionally well in my journalism subjects is incredibly important for me. So it makes sense to say that I work hard because I'm desperately trying to achieve my goal, my dream. I guess this is why I find it so hard to understand it when people seem to be motivation-less, when they screw around with their time and don't appear to want to do anything except get trashed.

Life without determination and without hard work seems to me to be rather pointless. If we don't have something that we want, if we only live in the moment then it seems that we're missing something big. Living in the present and without regrets is one thing, but taking those steps towards that goal makes the success even that much sweeter.

Until next time fellow humans....

Change is a powerful device, many people seem to hide from and refuse to acknowledge the inevitability of it, whereas others embrace it, sometimes too much. Change seems to have been one of the most prominent features in my life over this past year, nothing has stayed consistent. As humans we are all too willing and content to stay happy, to stay comfortable. If nothing in our lives ever changed we may assume that we will stay happy, that life will stay positive. Change is what brings about sadness and hardship, change will always be negative. Many people are afraid to embrace change, they're afraid that if they take one step out of line then the status quo will come tumbling down. But what good does it do us, to be scared to make a move? If people never changed then great opportunities would be missed, life would be passed by. You often hear people say that they're content with where they are, with who they are, with what they're doing, but I often wonder if that is even possible. If our ancestors hadn't changed and moved on, what great inventions and discoveries would we have to live without? If Marconi had been content with his small town life in Italy and hadn't travelled to Britain, would we have the radio? If the Bronte sisters had been content with their lives and status of women in society, if they hadn't written under their pseudonyms, would we have had two of the greatest literature masterpieces ever written? You may think that by staying still and refusing to acknowledge change that you're stopping it from happening, but you can't control time. Regardless of whether you accept it or not, the earth continues to rotate and lives continue to shorten. So that got me thinking, are people really truly content in their lives, or are they afraid to move? Because if you change and something unfortunate happens, then you'll forever have a scapegoat to blame things upon. But if you stay still and the same event were to occur, then that just signals that life happened, that everything went on its' due course. Though what I do know is that if you close your eyes and hope for the best, you miss an awful lot. Change can take you halfway across the world to the last place you imagined, or it can bring you right back home. It can bring you to new friends and faces or reaffirm an affinity with old ones. All I know is that you can either embrace change and surf the waves that get thrown at you, eyes wide open even if it stings, or you can tumble beneath them and refuse to acknowledge the phenomena that is indeed occurring all around you.

Until next time fellow humans....

I'm growing my hair and dying it back to its natural colour. I'm getting in shape and finally going to feel comfortable in my body. I'm getting a job so that I don't have to constantly worry about money. I'm working on a fake tan so that I no longer look like a snowman at the beach. I'm cleaning my bedroom out and redecorating it so that it resembles me, not a 13 year old. I'm figuring out myself, who I want and what I want. I have dreams, they are going to become a reality. It's going to happen and it's going to happen for me.

Until next time fellow humans....

Do I like being cynical? Of course not. Do I enjoy holding grudges long after I should, and long after I've said the wound is healed? Definitely not. I bottle up my anger too much, way too much and far too often. I used to take my anger and frustration out physically on myself because I had no idea how to channel it healthily. In all honesty, I'm constantly having to remind myself of the healthy way to do this. I'm not saying that I still hurt myself, but sometimes it is all too tempting to punch a wall or throw and slam things. But I don't do it because it won't help anything. So what is the proper way to deal with my overload of emotions? I vowed to always try my hardest not to take them out on others. Do I post emotionally charged blogs and let my feelings out? Do I talk to others about my issues? The latter is a possibility, except that means I'd constantly be unloading my shit onto them. Though there are those people who will always give me faith in the world, and no matter how bad my day was, if I see them then nothing else matters. I guess I'm still learning and growing, and I think this will be a continual struggle for me. I don't think we can ever fully recover from or outgrow our problems or addictions, I just think we learn to cope and handle them better.

Until next time fellow humans....

I'm the kind of girl who won't demand that you message her every hour, I trust you for a reason. I won't order a salad if we go out to dinner, give me a steak any day. I'll trust you to spend time with your female friends, I understand that they came first. I would rather go on stupid adventures with you or build a fort with blankets and pillows than go to parties. I'm comfortable enough in who I am to be able to walk around in my underwear and I'm not ashamed of it. I won't try and control your appearance and how you dress, you're obviously old enough to look after that department yourself. I will not expect an elaborate, sickly romantic or public proposal, in fact, I forbid it. I want to go on adventures with you, experience the majesty that the world has to offer. The world is too big not to explore it, you're crazy if you stay in one place. I won't demand the stereotypical "Christian" tradition of marriage as early as possible, plenty of time for that! I would rather dance in the rain with you and jump in puddles in my best dress than complain that my hair is ruined. I'll pull funny faces at you, poke my tongue out way too often and crinkle up my face when I'm not doing that. I'll be silly, anyone can be passionate, but real lovers are silly. I'll be sarcastic and take your jokes, then I'll fire them right back at you. I won't be clingy, because I hate clingy people, but I will always be there for you, and I will always need you. I'll watch scary movies with you, though I may have to hide my face if something gruesome happens. And I may even attempt to watch Jurassic Park the whole way through with you, thought that's a maybe. Basically, all you need to understand about me is that I will love you more than anyone you've ever met, and I will spend the rest of my life being hopelessly silly with you.

Until next time fellow humans....

I'll never understand why I seem to get my period at the most inconvenient time each month. I'll never understand why I not only have to put up with blood, but also debilitating stomach cramps. I'll never understand why young teenagers feel the need to have social networking sites and mobile phones, who are they talking to, Hannah Montana and Dora? I'll never understand why parents let their children who are younger than 16 get body piercings (not ears). I'll never understand why certain people feel the need to shove their beliefs down my throat. I'll never understand how people can throw away their lives because of drugs. I'll never understand how anyone can be a fan of anything Twilight related, I honestly can't. I'll never understand why I get goose bumps after stepping into warm water. I'll never understand the dreams that I have with complete strangers in them, do these people actually exist? I'll never understand how someone can keep going back to something that hurts them. I'll never understand why people think they have a say over who someone marries, love is love. I'll never understand how alcohol can make something more enjoyable. I'll never understand how someone can remain friends with someone who's hurt them awfully. I'll never understand why Tim Campbell was cast in the Sydney company of Wicked, I've seen more talent in a lice comb. I'll never understand why people tease the University of Western Sydney. I'll never understand why some females date younger men. I'll never understand how anyone can hate the Harry Potter series, it honestly bewilders me beyond belief. I'll never understand why some people place such a high value on facebook as a valid form of human communication. I'll never understand how stupid some people can be. I'll never understand why people work in jobs that they despise when they don't need to. I'll never understand how so many people think that being judgemental is them caring. I'll never understand why I still have the complexion of a 14 year old. I'll never understand why I am so terrified of velociraptors. I'll never understand why we as a society are more accustomed to seeing two men holding guns as opposed to holding hands. I'll never understand why unicorns, fairies and dragons aren't real. But what I do understand is that once we understand everything, the world loses its' shine and magic. Curiosity may have killed the cat, but the cat had 9 lives.

Until next time fellow humans....

It's days like these that I live for, days full of sunshine and laughter. Days like today are characterised by bright blue skies to accommodate the smiling sun, with a warm slight breeze to top it all off. It's days like today that make feel ecstatic to walk those 2km to the train station. The weather has always had a tremendous impact on my mood and personality, I always come alive in beautiful weather. I live for rambling conversations in the sun when you're surrounded by your group of friends. I don't even mind awkward silences when you look at each other and burst out laughing because you're not sure why it's so quiet. Singlet and short skirt days are my favourite, to me they symbolise endless opportunities. Whispered conversations in class and muffled laughter can make the time pass a lot faster, sometimes faster than you'd like it to. Grinning like an idiot all because of the beautiful weather seems to make perfect sense to me, it makes everything make sense. Sitting down quietly and listening to the birds sing is just one of the benefits of days like today. All I'm trying to say is that I live for infinite moments. I strongly believe that infinite is the best adjective there is to describe feelings and situations. Infinite is when you go for a long walk in beautiful weather and beautiful scenery. Infinite is when you're sitting at dinner and you're laughing so hard that you can't breathe. Infinite is long walks along the beach at night when it's freezing but you're wearing his hoodie. Infinite is that moment when you suddenly realise that your friendship means more to you then you ever thought it would. Infinite is long car rides where you miss the turn off and are momentarily crazy. Infinite is night times in a city apartment just staring at the cityscape and dreaming about your future. Infinite is watching the sunset from the roof of your hotel that is perfectly located under the Harbour Bridge. Infinite is finally meeting your role model after years of admiring them and their talent. Infinite is life, and you have to love it.

Until next time fellow humans....

Someone who is monogamous and is nice to their mother. Someone who will go to musicals with me and knows to not annoy me when I'm watching Buffy. Someone who thinks that fast cars are lame and that strip clubs are gross. Someone who picks up after themselves and knows how to wash their clothes. Someone who's hygienic and sweeps me off my feet like a Disney princess. Someone who reads good books and doesn't count Playboy or Zoo as literature. Someone who isn't afraid of love but doesn't overuse the phrase either. Someone who wants to have children and will let me name them. Someone who knows that I don't like mornings and won't try and communicate with me until I've had my juice. Someone who won't take my blankets in bed and knows that I get moody that time of the month. Someone who will let me cry when I want to and won't try and hug me unless I ask for it. Someone who doesn't want to know where I am every second of every day and trusts me to be faithful. Someone who will let me spend time with my friends, males and females. Someone who doesn't spend all their time playing computer games but also isn't obsessed with sports. Someone who is tolerant and open minded, the world is black and white and all shades of grey. Someone who thinks that Jessica Alba is ugly and will accept all my flaws and scars. Someone who will take me to high tea and won't complain the entire time. Someone who won't boss me around but knows that I love them more than anyone. Someone who will laugh at my incredibly lame jokes and will understand that I love the Chaser boys. Someone who won't try and sleep with people when they're drunk and knows that alcohol is never an excuse. Someone who thinks smoking is silly and will hold my bag when need be. Someone who will love me now and will love me when I'm old, that's what I want.

Until next time fellow humans....

Who you are

This post seems to require a lot of deep and philosophical thoughts and pondering, and I honestly don't know if I can give it justice. I'm a daughter, a sister, a niece, a cousin, a granddaughter, a great niece, a second and third cousin.....the story goes on. But I don't think any of those labels sufficiently describe who I am as a human being. I'm alive, I have over active tear ducts, I bruise easily and I've bled just to feel. I'm a lover of people, in all shapes and sizes I can't help but feel empathy. I bottle up my emotions and my pain except when I write, when I write my life spills out onto the page or the keyboard. I love my friends dearly and I would do absolutely anything for them. I dream big and I aim for the stars, though I may never meet your expectations. I am family oriented, always have been and always will be. I'm a hopeless romantic, I can't help it. I still believe in fairy tales and prince charmings and magical kingdoms, I think you have to. I think you need an escape in this world, you need to believe that their is some hope left somewhere. That's why I read, so I can journey through a whole other world, defeating the bad guys and falling in love along the way. If I hadn't attended Hogwarts or fled to Kiamo Ko or been held captive by Dracula or been a wallflower, I don't know where I'd be. I am me, through all the good and all the bad. And I believe it's true, love washes away the dust of everyday life.

Until next time fellow humans....

In this past month, what have you learned

That you can't state your political opinion without people having to put their views across. That your agreement with several policies of said party must automatically mean that you agree with all of their policies. That everybody has the right to put forth their views on your life and what you believe. That two people with very different opinions can still have a wonderful friendship. That not everybody is perfect, even the most perfect appearing people have their faults. That love knows no boundaries, whether it be gender, age or distance. That even as a 19 year old, a hug from Mum can still make everything seem better. That true friends let you turn up at their house because you have no hot water at yours and all you need is a shower. To be trusted is a far greater compliment than to be loved. That you should chase your dreams even if others don't agree. That the moments worth cherishing are when you're sitting in a restaurant and everyone is laughing so hard that you are gasping for breath and you're having issues staying upright (and you haven't even consumed alcohol). Even when life is at its' worst, a smile from that special someone can make it all better. That music that meant the world to you once will never cease to have that affect on you. That humour is a powerful tool if used correctly. That historical situations can easily be applied into modern contexts. That one university subject can make your day happy, regardless if everything else in your life is falling apart. That sometimes some people really just aren't worth the trouble that they cause. That facebook is a damaging tool for communication and isn't worth its' perks. That I own reading glasses for a reason and I really should start using them more often. That many preconceived notions about people are wrong, but many are also correct. That some people who enter your life are meant to stay there and you really are lucky to have them. That just because you once used to fit into something so comfortably doesn't necessarily mean you always will. That life after high school is so much better. That a television show really can change your life, and don't try and tell me that it can't. That time passes fast, way too fast. That my church family really are the most amazing group of people. That someone telling you that they're proud of you is the greatest compliment. That some people are even more lost than I am. That even despite all the pain, tears and hurt, you have to keep fighting. Life may kick you down on occasion, but the worth is when you get right back up again and keep on going. Life wasn't meant to be easy, but it was meant to be worth it. And it really is worth it, it really is. In that first kiss, that one smile, that kind word, that thoughtful letter. Despite it all, you have to keep living, you just have to.

Until next time fellow humans....

A picture of you last year and now, how you have changed since then

The first photograph is of me approximately this time last year, the second was taken today. Well my entire life has changed in the space of that one year, hardly anything is the same. I grew up and moved on from high school, something I never thought would happen. I realised that a whole other world existed, a world that I wanted to explore and taste. I put many old relationships behind me, some unwillingly and with great pain, and others with ease. Other relationships I carried with me, holding fast to for dear life. I welcomed new relationships and began the foreign journey of having to meet people all over again. I let go of past hurt and began to let time heal wounds, no matter how excruciating the process was. I learned to stand up for myself and what I believe in and not to let others define my life for me. I'm becoming comfortable in my own skin, which is still a continual process. Most importantly, I've discovered that life goes on, no matter what happens. No matter how much hurt or pain or tears that have occurred, life continues to march on. As many friendships fail, there are others waiting in the wings that are much more worth while. Somewhere along this journey I grew up, I stopped living for others and letting boys define me and how I treated myself. I think as adolescents we all run around pretty lost, looking for meaning in our lives and what we should be living for. I started to believe in myself and my potential and somewhere along the way that lost little girl finally grew up.



Until next time fellow humans....

Why you are doing this 30 day challenge

I like to think that these challenges help me to sharpen my writing skills while giving my loyal readers something interesting to read. Though, I'm probably wrong. I also wasn't feeling very creative when I begun this challenge, yet needed to keep writing, so I started this one. But that being said, I'm rather sick of having to follow this list of posts, so once these 30 days are finished I will go back to writing what is in my brain, no matter how scatty that may be.

Until next time fellow humans....

What you think about your friends

That statement is already loaded with an answer, the fact that I am friends with someone indicates that I must at least like them. And for me personally, I'm not friends with anyone that I don't want to have in my life. So generally speaking, I think very good things about my friends. I think Jess is the craziest designer in the world, and I love that about her. I love that she decided to do Advertising and that we were able to meet. I love how easy it is to talk to her and how right our friendship feels. I love that we are on the same page for so many things, she just gets me. I think that Zoe is an amazing human being and I love the way that she cares for others. I love how she is so concerned about the big picture and she wants to make the world a better place. I also love being with her and how much fun we have together. I think that Abigail is one of the least judgemental people I've ever encountered. I love how she knows all the crap in my life and loves me just the same. I love her morbid fashion sense and her infatuation with Michael Cera. I love that she was my 'companion' when I got my nipple pierced. I think that Rachel is one of the funniest people I've ever encountered and we always have the best time together. I love how accepting she is and all her crazy obsessions. I think that Ari is the wackiest bundle of energy that I have in my life. I love how even though we don't agree with everything that the other believes in, we still have a great relationship. I think that Cathy is quite possibly the most amazing person I've ever met. I love how easy she is to talk to and how completely she understands me. I love how we have so much fun together and she doesn't judge me. I think that Nathan goes alright on toast. I love how well Nathan knows me, even when I'm desperately trying to hide. I love all of the crazy adventures that we share and our fantastic memories.
I do have more friends than those mentioned, but I believe that these are the key players in my life. I love my friends, plain and simple. There's a reason I've kept them in my life for so long.

Until next time fellow humans....

What I would find in your bag

What a bizarre question. My bag is home to all sorts of weird and wonderful things. On a normal weekday when I have university, my bag contains my notebook, a pen, a highlighter and any library books/text books that I may have. My bag will almost always contain the following; a bottle of water, my wallet, my lip balm, my phone and a small bag that holds my ipod, keys, eye drops and two nasal sprays. My bag will also hold; my train timetable, my umbrella, my glasses, body spray, hand sanitiser, the novel I'm reading and a small pouch which contains important items. These important items are; pads, a mirror, a lip gloss, hair tie, bobby pins, tissues, band aids, inhaler, Sudafed, Nurofen and Nurofen Plus. As I'm sure you've realised, my bag is rather important to me as I travel about my week. At the moment I'm struggling to decide on an allocated bag to take to university each day, but while the bag may change, its contents rarely do.

Until next time fellow humans....

eleanor, a 20 year old Australian. I'm introverted, socially awkward, a bit of a wallflower and prefer the company of books. I write and live in a fantasy land. I believe in love in all its forms. Harry Potter changed my life. My patronus is a unicorn.

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November 2009, December 2009, January 2010, February 2010, March 2010, April 2010, May 2010, June 2010, July 2010, August 2010, September 2010, October 2010, November 2010, December 2010, January 2011, February 2011, March 2011,

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