Day 30 - Your Reflection In The MirrorDear My reflection in the mirror
I want to apologise to you for all of the shit that I've given you and put you through over the years. I'm sorry for constantly telling you that you weren't good enough. I'm sorry for all of those times that I called you fat and ugly and other awful things. I'm sorry for those times that I hurt you on purpose, you never deserved any of it. I'm sorry for the permanent physical scars that I left you with. I'm sorry for the mental gymnastics that I'm constantly putting you, thank you for not going insane. Thank you for not cracking under the constant stress and pressure that I put you under, you deserve a hell of a lot more credit than I ever give you.
Chin up champion, every thing will be fine in the end, it always is. Don't let other people talk shit to you or get you down on yourself. You have so much more proof that you are a good human being than a crap one, so try your hardest to focus on the positive things. I know that there are many this in this world that you'll never understand, and I know that these things will probably never stop confusing you. But try not to think about these things so much, some things are better left unexplained. I know that sometimes it worries you when it comes to what people think of you, as much as you hate to admit it. Please try your hardest not to care, the opinions of others honestly don't matter as much as you think it does.
I'm really proud of how well you've transitioned this year and how well you've survived the transition from high school to university. I honestly didn't think you'd cope well at all, and I know that you were terrified, but you really have come out on top. I think that you've made some really mature (and difficult) decisions, and I am super proud of you for that. There are some people that are really important to you, and in all honesty, I don't think that you could have found anyone better to surround yourself with. And when it comes to your love life and romantic interests, I can see how happy you are. I know that you are happier and more content than you have been in a good long time. I have never seen anyone have this effect on you, you almost seem to be a better version of yourself. I like how happy you are, I like the way that you seem to glow and float. And I like anyone a hell of a lot who has such a positive effect on you.
Thank you for being the truly wonderful person that you are. Thank you for supporting me and for not hating me. Thank you for putting up with my abuse and coming out on the other side. I am honestly flattered to be doing life with you.
Sincerely Eleanor
Until next time fellow humans....
